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Jeremy Corbyn and Boris Johnson somehow ended up at the same barber shop.
As they sat there, each being worked on by a different barber, not a word
was spoken.
The barbers were both afraid to start a conversation, for fear it would turn
to politics.
As the barbers finished their shaves & trims, the one who had Corbyn in his
chair reached for the aftershave.
Corbyn was quick to stop him jokingly saying, "No thanks, my wife,
will smell that and think I've been in a brothel."
The second barber turned to Johnson and said, "How about you" Mr Johnson?"
Johnson replied, "Go ahead, my Girlfriend doesn't know what the inside of a
brothel smells like"
DD 
Ubique.
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I`m reaching out on behalf of a mate of mine who needs some help.
His G/F told him to go out and get some of those pills that would help him get an erection.
When he came back he handed her a pack of diet pills.
Anyway he`s looking foe a place to live.
DD 
Ubique.
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The G/F told me to take a spider out instead of killing it.
We went and had drinks. Cool guy, wants to be a web designer.
DD 
Ubique.
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New craze Glass Coffins!!!
Will they take off? Remains to be seen!!
wiltshire baggie likes this post
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I remember one time when I was a kid my Dad was in a hurry to get to work, so he gave me money to pay the electric bill, but instead, I rode my bicycle nearly ten miles away to a local car dealership where I bought some raffle tickets to win a brand new car.
Late that night when my Dad got home from work, he asked if I remembered to pay the bill, but rather than lying, I had to explain to him what I did.
He beat the crap out of me that night.
But here’s the best part of the story... A few nights later, when my Dad got home after another long day at work, outside my house was a brand new car sitting at the end of our driveway. He just looked at me with a blank stare and tears in his eyes. My Brother and Sister cried, my Mom cried, we all cried, especially me, because the car was from the electric company and they were there to cut off the electricity, and so my Dad beat the crap out of me again, but this time it was in the dark.
DD
Ubique.
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How do you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator??
I`ll tell you in a while, maybe later.
DD 
Ubique.
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I WAS going to get an ultra long strap fitted to my watch and wear it like a belt round my trousers, but my mate thought it would be a waist of time
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I think it is fair to say I don't like Birmingham City fans, a certain faction, at least. That is all.
Not all men are sexist but all men can stop sexism. CALL IT OUT!
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(23-11-2019, 20:49)Amelia Chaffinch Wrote: I think it is fair to say I don't like Birmingham City fans, a certain faction, at least. That is all.
... don't get that one, Amelia 
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They're a little, ahem, common....
Not all men are sexist but all men can stop sexism. CALL IT OUT!
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