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Dingle-Dingle Offline
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#2,281
05-07-2019, 11:51
I bought some Rocket salad the other day, but it went off before I could eat it. DD Doh Doh
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Dingle-Dingle Offline
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#2,282
05-07-2019, 17:42
Dear diary.

Day 284 without sex, went jogging in flip flops, just to remember the sound.

DD Cool Cool
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#2,283
06-07-2019, 01:43
A young girl, covered in sweat and crying and staggering across the street was stopped by the police in Darlington last week. The officer said, "You alright me love?"
She said, "Yeah, just forgot me fone and runnining back to get it."
The Officer said,,,,,,, "Ok me love, hop in and we´ll give you a lift, where do you live then?"
She answered " Wolverhampton, ta a lot"

DD Tongue Tongue
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#2,284
06-07-2019, 14:47
If I had a pound for every time I`ve been called a gullible fool, I could probably afford those magic beans I`ve been watching on Ebay. DD Rolleyes Rolleyes
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#2,285
06-07-2019, 19:21
If someone from Holland married a Filipino, would their children be Hollopinos?? DD Huh Huh
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Dingle-Dingle Offline
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#2,286
08-07-2019, 17:54
FAO, West Brom board.........

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=4+suitcase+...d=54865631

DD Angry Angry
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BaggieSteve Offline
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#2,287
08-07-2019, 20:43
(08-07-2019, 17:54)Dingle-Dingle Wrote: FAO, West Brom board.........

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=4+suitcase+...d=54865631

DD  Angry  Angry

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#2,288
09-07-2019, 11:11
I asked my G/F what she wanted for her birthday.
She said "Something to make my knickers wet".
So I bought her a new washing machine.

DD Whistle Whistle
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#2,289
09-07-2019, 13:04
I paid 3 grand for my G/F to have a nose job. She was happy.
I paid 4 grand for her to have a boob job. She was delighted.
I treat myself to a £50 blow job and she goes apeshit.

DD Sick Sick
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#2,290
09-07-2019, 15:19
A plastic bag goes to the Doctor. After a thorough examination the Doctor says, " I'm very sorry but I think you've got aids"

" That's impossible", says the plastic bag. "I have never ever had sex".

"Well in that case" replied the Doctor, " your mother must be a carrier".

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A guy walks into a drug store in America and asks for a pack of condoms.

"That'll be $5 with the tax" said the shopkeeper.

"Tacks", the guy exclaims, "I thought that you rolled them on.
Some days I'm top dog, most days I'm just the lamp post.
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