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The wife said she was going to London to watch the netball

I was looking in her bag and found a load of condoms....



Silly b***h doesn't even have a cock!!

Whistle
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Q: How do you get a twinkle in a Blonde's eye?

A: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Whistle
Some days I'm top dog, most days I'm just the lamp post.
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You can say what you like about women.
But I think being able to turn one sentence into a six hour arguement takes talent.

DD Laugh Laugh
Ubique.
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Anyone else think its strange how really sexy women drive cute little cars?
Which reminds me, the M.O.T.'s due on the G/F's Transit.

DD Tongue Tongue
Ubique.
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How do you milk sheep??

Bring out a new iPhone and charge £1000 for it.

DD Badger Badger
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Ubique.
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I was driving home from visiting my sister last night and I had a police car right up my arse for the whole journey.
I wish her xxxx kids would put their toys away!

DD Sad Sad
Ubique.
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Have you ever wondered about those people who pay a fortune for those little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards!.

DD Whistle Whistle
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Ubique.
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As I knelt down with a pair of size 4 shoes in front of this sexy blonde in a short skirt, I couldn't resist a quick glance at her knickers.
" Hey cheeky," She said, as she gave me a playful kick. "I bet the only reason you work here is to look up girls skirts isn't it?"
" That's an absolutely ridiculous accusation, Madam," I said sternly, " I don't even work here"......

DD Sad Sad
Ubique.
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Just read a book entitled 'The French Army During World War II, 1939 to 1945'. For those not familiar with the 24 Hour clock, that's twenty one minutes to eight until a quarter to eight at night.

DD Cool Cool
Ubique.
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DD Angry Angry
Ubique.
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