18-12-2015, 21:14
What do you call a smelly Santa?
"Farter Christmas"
DD
"Farter Christmas"
DD
Ubique.
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The Off Topic Thread
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18-12-2015, 22:19
(This post was last modified: 18-12-2015, 22:20 by Dingle-Dingle.)
My neighbour put up his Christmas lights today.
I bet he's pissed that I beat him to it. I put mine up three years ago. DD
Ubique.
18-12-2015, 23:31
What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a new job the next day.
DD
Ubique.
19-12-2015, 12:11
Last year, I asked Santa for the sexiest person ever for Christmas.
I woke up in a box.DD
Ubique.
19-12-2015, 13:34
(This post was last modified: 19-12-2015, 13:57 by Dingle-Dingle.)
Why is there no champagne at Chelsea`s Christmas party?
Because Mouriniho got rid of the Fizzy-o DD
Ubique.
19-12-2015, 14:45
Why don`t Volkswagen hold Christmas services?
They get the readings wrong. DD
Ubique.
20-12-2015, 03:41
One beautiful December evening Pepito and his girlfriend Pepita were sitting by the side of the ocean. It was a romantic full moon, when Pepe said "Hey, mamacita, let's play Weeweechu."
"Oh no, not now, lets look at the moon" said Pepa. "Oh, c'mon baby, let's you and I play weeweechu. I love you and it's the perfect time," Pepito begged. "But I wanna just hold your hand and watch the moon." "Please, corazoncito, just once, play Weeweechu with me." Pepita looked at Pepito and said, "OK, one time, we'll play Weeweechu." Pepito grabbed his guitar and they both sang..... "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, "Weeweechu a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year." DD 
Ubique.
20-12-2015, 14:15
My wallet is like an Onion.
Every time I open it, it makes me cry. DD
Ubique.
20-12-2015, 22:08
(This post was last modified: 20-12-2015, 22:11 by Dingle-Dingle.)
Name That Christmas Carol Clues:
1. Bleached Yule 2. Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration 3. Singular Yearning for the Twin Anterior Incisors 4. Righteous Darkness 5. Arrival Time2400 hrs - WeatherCloudless 6. Loyal Followers Advance 7. Far Off in a Feeder 8. Array the Corridor 9. Bantam Male Percussionist 10. Monarchial Triad 11. Nocturnal Noiselessness 12. Jehovah Deactivate Blithe Chevaliers 13. Red Man En Route to Borough 14. Frozen Precipitation Commence 15. Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle 16. The Quadruped with the Vermillion Probiscis 17. Query Regarding Identity of Descendant 18. Delight for this Planet 19. Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings 20. The Dozen Festive 24 Hour Intervals. DD
Ubique.
20-12-2015, 23:13
I was visiting my son last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st Century" he said "We don`t waste money on newspapers, here use my IPad." I can tell you this........ That fly didn`t know what hit him. DD
Ubique.
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