Thread Rating:
The Off Topic Thread
Pulis only has three. The other 4 are right.
Reply
Big Ron (or is that outside of the date range?)
Roy Hodgson (how did I miss that one!)
Graeme Souness
Steve (don't let him near my club) Bruce
Reply
All correct, big Ron had 4 in the date range.
Reply
A guy in a supermarket goes up to the cashier and places two cans of dog food on the counter.
The cashier asks, "Do you have a dog sir?"
"Yes, it's at home," replies the man.
"To be able to sell you the dog food sir, I must see the dog. That is store policy," says the cashier.
Next day the man goes places two cans of cat food on the counter.
"Do you own a cat sir?" asks the cashier. "Yes I do, it's at home," says the man.
"Well I am sorry sir. Store policy. I must see the cat before I can sell you cat food," says the cashier.
The next day the man returns to the store and walks directly to the same cashier. He has a brown paper bag in his hand.
"Here," he says to the cashier, "put your hand in here."
The cashier puts her hand in the brown paper bag. "It is all soft and warm," she says.
"Yes, that's right," says the man, "I need to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

DD Sick Sick
Ubique.
Reply
A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye.
He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it.
Once he was in the doctor's office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over.
The first thing the proctologist saw when he looked up the man's ass was that eye staring right back at him.
"You know, " said the doctor, "you really have to learn to trust me."

DD Laugh Laugh
Ubique.
Reply
This older Jewish man was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he insisted that his son, a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to receive the anesthesia he asked to speak to his son.
"Yes Dad, what is it?"
"Don’t be nervous, son, do your best and just remember, if it doesn’t go well, if something happens to me… your mother is going to come and live with you and your wife…"

DD Tongue Tongue
Ubique.
Reply
A very well known London shoe shop had it´s entire shoe display stolen from outside the shop yesterday.
Police are looking for a gang of one legged men who were seen in the vacinity.

DD Big Grin Big Grin
Ubique.
Reply
I had the pleasure of bumping into Tony Bomber Brown in M&S at Merry Hill today with his lovely wife(well I think it was his wife) Laugh

What a lovely and very Humble man he is. Shook the great mans hand after saluting him (old habits). His missus said well that a first he's never been saluted before!! My reply "he deserves more than a Salute he deserves a Knighthood.
Wanted to ask him a thousand questions but let him on his way.
Thumb up
talkSAFT, Ska'dForLife-WBA, bomberbrown1968 like this post
BLACK COUNTRY BY BIRTH, ALBION BY THE GRACE OF GOD AND MY OLD MAN

You go in the cage? cage goes in the water, sharks in the water....Our Shark Cry

Ultrinque Paratus
Reply
Worldclass, met him in the very same store about 7 months ago, and he was everything I wanted him to be from idolising him as a lad, told him he'd be worth £50M these days, and he said don't know about that but thanked me anyway. HE thanked me????. That man should be in the dictionary as the definition for LEGEND. Thumb up

I asked him how he thought we'd end up seeing as it was now nearing the end of January and things weren't looking too good and he said WE'LL be fine, I genuinely think he loves our club as much as we do.

I shook his hand but have to admit I didn't salute him Big Grin .

I walked away like a kid who'd just been to see Santa Blush

Different times nowadays but Saido - take note Sad
talkSAFT and Worldclassalbion like this post
Reply
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead were trying out for a new NASA experiment on sending women to different planets.
First, they called the brunette in and asked her a question. "If you could go to any planet, what planet would you want to go to and why?"
After pondering the question she answered, "I would like to go to Mars because it seems so interesting with all the recent news about possible extra terrestrial life on the planet." They said "well okay, thank you." And told her that they would get back to her.
Next, the redhead entered the room and the NASA people asked her the same question. In reply, "I would like to go to Saturn to see all of its rings." Again, "thank you" and they would get back to her.
Finally, the blond entered the room and they asked her the same question they asked the brunette and the redhead.
She thought for a while and replied, "I would like to go to the sun."
The people from NASA replied, "why, don't you know that if you went to the sun you would burn to death?"
The blond smirked and put her hands on her hips. "Are you guys dumb? I'd go at night!"

DD Doh Doh
Ubique.
Reply
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 104 Guest(s)