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(15-10-2020, 10:14)Dingle-Dingle Wrote: This is the first year I haven`t done the London Marathon due to Covid.
I normally don`t do it because I`m fat and can`t run.
DD 
I actually did it this year for the first time after 8 attempts to get in. Problem was it was virtual so ran in Derbyshire countryside listening to an app on the phone with crowd cheering at every mile and Steve Cram and Paula Radcliffe telling me how well I was doing. One day I might actually get to do the real thing but not holding my breath. You can join me Dingle.
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Ubique.
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Phoned the garage, the mechanic asked what the problem was:
Me: It has no power, frequently stalls, randomly jumps into reverse and pulls badly to the left, can you have a look at it?
Mechanic: What kind of car is it?
Me: It's a Kia Starmer
DD 
Ubique.
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The Queen and Dolly Parton both died on the same day and were waiting outside the Pearley Gates. Saint Petrus came by and said, "Sorry, we´ve only got room for one at the moment, so which one of you should i let in?"
Dolly dropped her bra and said, "Arn´t they heavanly Petrus?"
The Queen went into the bog, flushed the loo and Saint Petrus said, "You may enter, your Majesty."
Dolly was fuming and said, What the fxxk, cause she had a shite she can come in but you ignore ma big pair?"
Saint Petrus said, Dolly you should know that a Royal Flush beats a pair anytime!"
DD 
Ubique.
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See we´re getting near to the time of year where the richest of the rich start begging the poorest of the poor to give to the needy and they started early this year now.
Watched this programm the other day where this scarecrow looking guy, Bob Geldorf or summit like that said, "Come on people, pick up your fone and pledge for the needy."
So I did, and after half an hour, sitting there with my phone and a tin of pledge in one hand, nothing happened so i polished my phone with the pledge. It´s gleaming now and smells nice too, hope that helps ya Bob!
DD 
Ubique.
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I always knew this Covid thing would end in tiers........
DD 
Ubique.
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The clock`s go back an hour this weekend.
So will the virus start attacking people in pubs at 9 o clock, or will it still wait until 10??
DD 
Ubique.
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24-10-2020, 10:27
(This post was last modified: 24-10-2020, 10:28 by Dingle-Dingle.)
Can a member of Admin please explain to me why my post was removed.?
I am very annoyed about it because my fence has now fallen over.
DD
Ubique.
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"Alexa, what`s the weather going to be like this weekend".?
Alexa... "Why, you can`t go anywhere"?
DD
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I can't imagine what life's like for (say) 20 year-olds right now.
When I was 20 (or so) life was perfect:
I enjoyed Work, but went out pubbing, clubbing, and dating every night. Then, weekends, I'd follow Albion Home and Away, and play Football on Sundays. Perfect!
I don't know many 20 y-os, but God! it must be torture.   
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with
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