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Q: What do you call Santa's helpers?
A: Subordinate clauses.

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Anyone seen Prince Andrews Christmas sweater?
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Why does Santa always come through the chimney?

Because he knows better than to try the back door.

DD Flashing Flashing Flashing
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Can someone PLEASE buy Chris Rea a sat nav for Christmas.

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I’ve just found a present in the loft that I was meant to give the kids last Christmas, pretty gutted.....they would have loved that puppy.....

DD Laughing Laughing Laughing
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Every year the Grandkids manage to find their Christmas presents so this year I was advised to keep them in the loft.
Its been 4 days now and all they do up there is cry!

DD Walking Walking Walking
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Breaking news......

6 Liverpool players who played against Villa last night have tested positive for Calpol.

DD Tongue Tongue
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Why are women's breasts like a train set a kid gets at Christmas time?

Because they were originally made for children but the father wants to play with them.

DD Flashing Flashing Flashing
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How did Mary and Joseph find out how heavy Jesus was when he was born??

They had a weigh in a manger.

DD Walking Walking Walking
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How long do a reindeers legs have to be?
Long enough so they can touch the ground!

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