[Dingle-Dingle]

England qualify for the World Cup in Russia.

Odds of 25-1 at the bookies to win the tournament.

For those of you who don`t understand the odds system let me explain.....

Bet £10 on England to win....... Lose £10.

Simples!

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

What is the matter with young men today? Walking down the street and I saw these two blokes wearing identical outfits, right down to the same belts, so I yelled out, "Oi you pair of c***s, are you twins still being dressed by ya mother?"
It was at this point that they arrested me..

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Guys. I need your help.

I`m in the middle of an arguement with the G/F and she`s told me I`m right.........

WTF do I do now?

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

I`m pretty sure I had a good time last night.....

Let me finish reading the Police report and I`ll let you know.

DD

[4evaabaggie]

Guys. I need your help.

I`m in the middle of an arguement with the G/F and she`s told me I`m right.........

WTF do I do now?

DD    

Sorry dingle dingle, no bloke can help you, this has never happened before!

[Dingle-Dingle]

I've just bought a new vacuum cleaner, does anyone want my old one? It's under the stairs just gathering dust...

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

My girlfriend was sat doing the crossword the other day.
"8 letter word for a shape beginning with T", she said.
"Triangle", says I.
" Your a thick get she says, Angle begins with an A!!"

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

So there I am minding my own business when 'knock knock'.
'Who's there' I said.
'It's the Police Sir.'
I shouted, 'You'll have to wait, I'm having a shit',
'We know sir, the phone box has glass sides!!'.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

No words need be said.

   

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

I thought she asked if I was interested in an orgy.

It turned out what she actually said was "4G".

My apologies to the lady working at "T-Mobile".

DD