[Dingle-Dingle]

So Donald Trump has chosen Mickey Pence as his vice President..........

Not even Walt Disney could have imagined that one day Mickey and Donald would be running America.

DD

[silverbaggie]

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

The Doctor gave a man just six months to live. The man couldn't pay the bill, so the doctor gave him another six months.

Someone stole all my credit cards but, I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.

[Dingle-Dingle]

I phoned the chemist and said "Do you sell adult incontinence pants"?

He said "Yes..... May I ask where you`re ringing from"?

I replied " The waist down"

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

I rang The Child Abuse Line today.......


The kid at the other end called me a wanker & told me to xxxx off.

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

Letter to Department for Work and Pensions:

Dear Sir,

I have a very complicated Benefits Question:

Many years ago, I married a widow out of love who had an 18-year-old daughter. After the wedding, my father, a widower, came to visit a number of times, and he fell in love with my step-daughter. My father eventually married her without my authorization.

As a result, my step-daughter legally became my step-mother and my father my son-in-law. My father's wife (also my step-daughter) and my step-mother, gave birth to a son who is my grandchild because I am the husband of my step-daughter's mother. This boy is also my brother, as the son of my father.

As you can see, my wife became a grandmother, because she is the mother of my father's wife. Therefore, it appears that I am also my wife's grandchild.

A short time after these events, my wife gave birth to a son, who became my father's brother-in-law, the step-son of my father's wife, and my uncle. My son is also my step-mother's brother, and through my step-mother, my wife has become a grandmother and I have become my own grandfather. In light of the above mentioned, I would like to know the following:

Does my son, who is also my uncle, my father's son-in-law, and my step-mother's brother fulfill the requirements for receiving childcare benefits?

Sincerely yours,

W Olvesfan.

DD

[Arcane Astral Aeons]

Letter to Department for Work and Pensions:

Dear Sir,

I have a very complicated Benefits Question:

Many years ago, I married a widow out of love who had an 18-year-old daughter. After the wedding, my father, a widower, came to visit a number of times, and he fell in love with my step-daughter. My father eventually married her without my authorization.

As a result, my step-daughter legally became my step-mother and my father my son-in-law. My father's wife (also my step-daughter) and my step-mother, gave birth to a son who is my grandchild because I am the husband of my step-daughter's mother. This boy is also my brother, as the son of my father.

As you can see, my wife became a grandmother, because she is the mother of my father's wife. Therefore, it appears that I am also my wife's grandchild.

A short time after these events, my wife gave birth to a son, who became my father's brother-in-law, the step-son of my father's wife, and my uncle. My son is also my step-mother's brother, and through my step-mother, my wife has become a grandmother and I have become my own grandfather. In light of the above mentioned, I would like to know the following:

Does my son, who is also my uncle, my father's son-in-law, and my step-mother's brother fulfill the requirements for receiving childcare benefits?

Sincerely yours,

W Olvesfan.

DD    

if i worked at the DWP that would go straight in the bin simply because
of the last bit
W Olvesfan
even the dwp know wolves fans cant write

[Dingle-Dingle]

Just after the G/F gave birth, I asked the midwife
"How soon do you think we'll be able to have sex"
She winked at me and said, "I'm off duty in ten minutes,
Meet me in the car park".

DD

[Dingle-Dingle]

The kin dog ran off last night.
I walked round the park calling his name for 20 mins & still couldn't find him.
My G/F said I should look harder.
So I shaved my head & got a tattoo. I still can't find the king dog..,

DD

[Arcane Astral Aeons]

Rolf Harris Cleared Of Sex Charges
one outstanding charge of Tying His Kangaroo Down is yet to be proved

[Dingle-Dingle]

I shouted to the G/F... "How do I use the washing machine"?

"What are you putting in it"? she shouted back.

"Clothes" I replied........ And I thought I was thick.

DD