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The Off Topic Thread - Printable Version

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RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 06-05-2022

I said to the G/F "You should embrace your mistakes".

She hugged me.

DD #No1 Big Grin Big Grin


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-05-2022

I`m in two minds whether I`m a schizophrenic or not.

DD#No1 Blush Blush


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-05-2022

Does a one legged duck swim in circles??

DD#No1 Huh Huh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 19-05-2022

*** Breaking News ***

Mr Kipling driver forced to make emergency stop on motorway.

He said "Fortunatly the lorry had exceedingly good brakes"

DD #No1 Doh Doh


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 19-05-2022

I bought a chicken to make sandwiches.

It doesn`t, it just shits on the floor.

DD#No1 Tongue Tongue


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 20-05-2022

If you are here for the yodelling lesson,

please form an orderly orderly orderly orderly queue.

DD#No1 Big Grin Big Grin


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 20-05-2022

I was in the shed throwing darts at a picture of the G/F pinned to the wall and try as I might I couldn`t hit the target.
She called out through the kitchen window "watcha doin"?

"Missing you" I replied.

DD#No1 Angel Angel


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Salopbaggie - 23-05-2022

I've just been thrown out of the theatre for continually heckling and booing.

The surgeon says he's never letting me back in again.


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 23-05-2022

I had a terrifying experience last night. I was alone in the house taking a bath when all of a sudden I felt a tap on my shoulder.

DD#No1 Rolleyes Rolleyes


RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 25-05-2022

I once lived just a stone`s throw away from a family who all died of mysterious head injuries.

DD#No1 Sick Sick