The Off Topic Thread - Printable Version +- Sports Babble - sports forum (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk) +-- Forum: Football (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?fid=1) +--- Forum: English Football Leagues (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?fid=2) +---- Forum: Sky Bet Championship (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?fid=49) +----- Forum: West Bromwich Albion (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?fid=21) +----- Thread: The Off Topic Thread (/showthread.php?tid=42) Pages:
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
50
51
52
53
54
55
56
57
58
59
60
61
62
63
64
65
66
67
68
69
70
71
72
73
74
75
76
77
78
79
80
81
82
83
84
85
86
87
88
89
90
91
92
93
94
95
96
97
98
99
100
101
102
103
104
105
106
107
108
109
110
111
112
113
114
115
116
117
118
119
120
121
122
123
124
125
126
127
128
129
130
131
132
133
134
135
136
137
138
139
140
141
142
143
144
145
146
147
148
149
150
151
152
153
154
155
156
157
158
159
160
161
162
163
164
165
166
167
168
169
170
171
172
173
174
175
176
177
178
179
180
181
182
183
184
185
186
187
188
189
190
191
192
193
194
195
196
197
198
199
200
201
202
203
204
205
206
207
208
209
210
211
212
213
214
215
216
217
218
219
220
221
222
223
224
225
226
227
228
229
230
231
232
233
234
235
236
237
238
239
240
241
242
243
244
245
246
247
248
249
250
251
252
253
254
255
256
257
258
259
260
261
262
263
264
265
266
267
268
269
270
271
272
273
274
275
276
277
278
279
280
281
282
283
284
285
286
287
288
289
290
291
292
293
294
295
296
297
298
299
300
301
302
303
304
305
306
307
308
309
310
311
312
313
314
315
316
317
318
319
320
321
322
323
324
325
326
327
328
329
330
331
332
333
334
335
336
337
338
339
340
341
342
343
344
345
346
347
348
349
350
351
352
353
354
355
356
357
358
359
360
361
362
363
364
365
366
367
368
369
370
371
372
373
374
|
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 05-03-2015 How do you know if a Dingle has been in your back yard? Your wheelie bin is on bricks. DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 05-03-2015 Bill was instructing CPR to a group of Year 10 pupils as part of their PHSE syllabus. Classes always used a mannequin known as "Resusci Annie". This particular model was just a head and torso, no legs as it was easier to store it in it's case. The kids would practise on Annie in groups before they were tested. On examination day Little Beefy, as he had been taught knelt down next to Annie, shook her asking "Are you alright," he then put his ear next to her mouth to feel for breathing. So far, so good. He the turned to Bill and with a straight face said, "Sir, she says she can't feel her legs." DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 06-03-2015 When I was a kid my Mum said I could be anything I wanted to be, the sky's the limit, which was crap because I wanted to be an astronaut. DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 06-03-2015 Met a beautiful girl down at the park today. Sparks flew, she fell at my feet and We ended up having sex there and then. God, I love my new taser! DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 07-03-2015 RUDE WARNING......... If easily offended stop here. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . .. . . . . .. . . . .What's the difference between a woman and a dog turd? Nothing. The older they are, the easier they are to pick up. DD . . RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 08-03-2015 I went up into the attic and found a Stradivarius and a Rembrandt. Unfortunately Stradivarius was a terrible painter and Rembrandt made lousy violins. Sounds like a Baggies Pulis team at the moment. DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-03-2015 A duck is standing at the side of the road waiting to cross. A chicken walks up and says, "I wouldn't bother mate, you'll never hear the fukcing end of it." DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2015 When I was in the scouts, the leader told me to pitch a tent. I couldn't find any pitch, so I used creosote. DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2015 My fortune cookie last night. Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night. DD RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-03-2015 A priest was taking a shortcut through an alley one day and came upon a young boy who was masturbating. "My son, you shouldn't be doing that", said the priest. "You should be saving that for when you get married." The embarrassed boy hung his head down low and simply said "Yes, Father." About 10 years later the priest was in his study when a young man, in his early twenties came in. "Yes, my son?" said the priest. "Father, you may not remember me, but about 10 years ago you caught me masturbating in an alley, and I'll never forget the advice you gave then." "And what was that, my son?" "Well, you told me that what I was doing was wrong and I should be saving it for when I get married", said the young man. "That sounds like something I probably would have said" said the priest. "Did you take my advice?" "Yes I did, Father; but there's only one problem." "What's that, my son?" "Well, I have a 55 gallon drum of the stuff in the back of my pickup truck. Now that I am getting married, what am I supposed to do with it?" DD |