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+---- Forum: Sky Bet Championship (https://www.sportsbabble.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?fid=49)
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+----- Thread: The Off Topic Thread (/showthread.php?tid=42)
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RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 07-06-2019
Elton John, great on a piano, sucks on an organ!
BBC: Now Casualty is on series thirty three make it more realistic by having patients who were in the waiting area in series one seen by a doctor.
Seeing as flooding is, according to religious fuckwits, a direct result of gay marriage being legalised, shouldn't same sex marriage be encouraged in those countries affected by drought?
Gents… tease your partner during sex by only putting the first 7 inches of your penis in.
If you lie down, your belly button hole makes an ideal ketchup holder when eating chips at a festival
Recreate the ambience of living in Hull or Brixham by sellotaping an anchovy to your top lip.
Pretend you live in the 1970s by going for a shit without your mobile phone
Convince people you're a dentist by counting their teeth then charging them £200
Avoid being pestered by wasps at picnics by smearing jam all over your kids.
Ripen Green Bananas by turning your back on the sly bastards for a split second.
Never run with scissors. Instead, simply throw them in the direction you are heading, run to where they land and repeat until you safely reach your destination.
Female porn actresses. Make scenes more realistic by looking up occasionally and remarking "that ceiling could do with another coat "
Organise an instant family meeting with all your children by simply turning the Wifi off!
Dramatically increase your sex life by getting a divorce.
If you receive an email from the national lottery advising they have "exciting news" about your ticket, make sure you check what the "exciting news" is BEFORE you tell your boss to go xxxx himself with a rotten pineapple.
Struggling to get your wife’s attention? Simply sit down and look xxxx comfortable.
DD
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Beefy 1965 - 08-06-2019
Leyton Orient manager and former Tottenham and Portsmouth defender Justin Edinburgh has died aged 49.
Edinburgh was taken to hospital on Monday after falling "ill unexpectedly" and had been in Madrid for the Champions League final two days before.
RE: The Off Topic Thread - silverbaggie - 08-06-2019
(08-06-2019, 20:01)Beefy 1965 Wrote: Leyton Orient manager and former Tottenham and Portsmouth defender Justin Edinburgh has died aged 49.
Edinburgh was taken to hospital on Monday after falling "ill unexpectedly" and had been in Madrid for the Champions League final two days before.
What a tragedy for the Orient too as he has just helped guide them back into league football from the National league.
My thoughts are with his family.
RE: The Off Topic Thread - 4evaabaggie - 09-06-2019
Sad news ...... 49 is no age ... shows how fragile and precious life is .... brings footballing issues into true balance. Thoughts and best wishes go to his friends and family.
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-06-2019
Sat outside the pub with my mate Dave and said to him "You look troubled my friend".
"I`m going to be a Father" he said.
"That`s amazing" I replied "So what`s the problem"?
"I haven`t told my wife yet" he sighed.
DD
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Blue Baggie - 10-06-2019
(10-06-2019, 18:12)Dingle-Dingle Wrote: Sat outside the pub with my mate Dave and said to him "You look troubled my friend".
"I`m going to be a Father" he said.
"That`s amazing" I replied "So what`s the problem"?
"I haven`t told my wife yet" he sighed.
DD
The old one's still bring a grin
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 10-06-2019
Apparently Michael Gove has just announced a huge trade deal with Colombia, he also wants to cut VAT on small mirrors, glass coffee tables and razor blades.
DD
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-06-2019
Last week they were all hero`s..........
This week they want to take away their free TV licences.
DD
RE: The Off Topic Thread - talkSAFT - 11-06-2019
(11-06-2019, 17:04)Dingle-Dingle Wrote: Last week they were all hero`s..........
This week they want to take away their free TV licences.
DD
Good job Boris Johnson's priority is to cut Taxes for those earning over £50k! (the c**t)
RE: The Off Topic Thread - Dingle-Dingle - 11-06-2019
The G/F and 3 of her pals squeezed into my car after weight watchers.
I muttered. "Fat cows".
The G/F snapped "What was that"?
I said "You herd"
DD
