[theo_luddite]

Cambridge United v Town
Cledara Abbey Stadium
They've a Monk in their Cloisters
Fenland Central
PhD 04Me



Kick-off 19:45 UK Time
Mad Friday 20/12/24

Town head down the A1 and A14 to University City and the home of what at least one person who writes in the Grauniads comments sections calls the Wembley of the Fens. Well it might be the largest stadium in that neck of the woods, but Wembley it ain't. That said it's so flat round there if you stood on the roof of the highest stand, on a clear day you might be able to see as far as Denmark, or Holland, or Norwich. Well go on then you might see the A14/M11 at a push. Even steaming great piles of horse manure around Newmarket. You'll certainly feel the icy blasts coming in off the Russian Steppes in winter.

How to get there, what to do when you get there, how to get home - all in here.

https://footballgroundguide.com/leagues/...nited.html

Apparently your shoes might be two sizes bigger by the time you arrive at the turnstiles. Don't wear heels girls.

On the tellybox

Cambridge picked this one earlier in the season to be played on Mad Friday night and not be shown on the tellybox anywhere. Town agreed. Good luck with HTTV and any other means of watching. There are three games this evening in League One and the only one on the tellybox over here is Luton v Derby in The Chumpionship. They are bringing out the Happy Cardboard Clappers for this one.

Latest news

Town's players that haven't been ill this week (sounds like Norovirus or similar in the camp) have been doing the Santa run but not one of them was dressed as Santa, around the local hospitals. To be honest, they are all a bit skinny.

Hospital Rounds

Half-season cards still available, just in case you lot in furrin lands find yourself at a loose end with a few $1000's available to spunk on flights for visits to home games. Be here for Boxing Day to take full advantage of the generous offer of £180 (I'm sure I only paid ~£250 for the full season).

Out Injured/Suspended/Isolating
Thanks to Mr. Chicken's email for this.

Lasse Sorensen was forced off injured after coming on at the break against Lincoln. He may not be available for the weekend to face Cambridge, but the good news is that he has not reinjured his hamstring and was simply experiencing irritation in the scar tissue from his previous injury.

Nigel Lonwijk is suspended for the trip to Cambridge after picking up his fifth yellow card of the season on Saturday.

Bojan Radulovic missed that game with a knock and is expected to be out against Cambridge too.

Joe Hodge is back in modified training and will need to check in with Wolves again next week as he goes through the end stages of his recovery from a groin injury. Duff expects he is likely to be the next player back available.

Lee Nicholls is also in the final stages of his recovery from his elbow injury.

Antony Evans still has no return date set on his toe injury.

Radinio Balker is still looking at a return to first team action around the turn of the new year.

Jonathan Hogg is set to be out until late January-early February with a calf injury.

Rhys Healey is ruled out for the foreseeable with a calf issue, and Mickel Miller is not expected back until spring with his knee injury.

Back training but not oven ready/Back in the frame
Thanks to Mr. Chicken's email for this too.

David Kasumu got a dead leg late on against Lincoln, sparking an injury fear, but is fine and available for the weekend.

Tom Lees missed the Lincoln game through illness, while Matty Pearson went off just before half time feeling unwell. Both are hoped to be available to face Cambridge.

Last time out

Town turned up for the 2nd half against Lincoln to grab a point. We should have had all 3 without the penalty shout. Then again, Lincoln could have been 3 or 4 up by half-time. Brodie Spencer got his first for Town, heading in a cross from Josh Koroma before Callum Marshall buried a pass from Spencer.



Cambridge went to Wrexham and surprised us all by getting a 2-2 draw, Cambridge equalising in the 89th minute with a penalty.
We only dream of getting and scoring penlties, unless they are penalty shoot-outs.



Results last weekend left Town in 4th place again but 5 points adrift of 3rd. Whilst Wycombe won as expected at Shrewsbury, Brum beat Brizzle to move into 2nd. Wrexham dropped to 3rd after drawing with Cambridge. Just below Town, Stockport, Reading and Bolton all lost so no changes there other than Barnsley catching Bolton on points.



Down amongst the deadmen, Shrewsbury and Cambridge you know about, Burton picked up a point at Orient, Crawley lost out in a 7 goal game at Posh. Brizzle and Northampton now find themselves sat on the trap door.

Musical Comical Interlude

Cambridge University is famous for its "Footlights" theatrical Sketch Comedy Troupe. Many a BBC* comedian has learned the trade (and how to get on the BBC) here. So as a change from the old rock and roll, here's a few you may have heard of earlier.
* Other TV channels with comedians are available - like Dave.







and of course, there's these four ....



The Sack Race

Christmas "Cards" were being thrown around like confetti on Sunday and Monday. P-45's, Pink-Slips, call 'em as your see 'em, this will see more than a few checking their year end tax returns if they'd somehow classed themselves as self-employed.

In no particular order,
Des Buckingham of Oxford after 398 days
Gary O'Neil of Wolverhampton after 497 days
Russell Martin of Southampton after 546 days
Matt Taylor of Brizzle Rovers after 383 days

Wolves have since appointed another Portuguese coach, Vitor Pereira, who was most recently earning the Oil Dollars in Riyadh.
Burton have appointed Gary Bowyer and Tom Hounsell
Lee Cattermole is keeping the chair warm at Brizzle, he only joined them last Thursday.

Tables, Form & Stats

Town are 18 places and 19 points above Cambridge.



Town are now 10 League games unbeaten but still not much closer to a Top 2 spot.







Cambridge started the season in abysmal form. After 3 games they had one point. After 9 games they still only had one point. U's Fans were clamouring for a certain Monk's head on a stick. Then they won the next 3. Then Posh thumped 6 past them and they have drawn 4, won 1 (at home to Shrewsbury) and lost one since.

They've sneaked out of the bottom 4 twice this season, but otherwise they've been mostly crap. They are unbeaten at home in 5 games however while they have beaten fellow cellar dwellers Burton and Shrewsbury, but they've also drawn with Barnsley and Bolton and at Wrexham. They can be handy on their day. The Monk is still hanging around.

Innies and Outies

In a city full of the offspring of some of the richest toffs in the country (and way beyond) there's not much brass to chuck around down Abbey Stadium. Not that anyone is throwing vast sums of cash in their direction either.



Who's banging 'em in

Ain't nobody,
Like Kachunga.
Ain't nobody,
Makes me feel this way ....



He's in a groove right now, having scored in both of the last two games. He can score their 1 if we can get 2. Lavery is injured so unlikely to play.

They can't all win

Wycombe are home to Bolton, whilst Brum go to Crawley on Monday for a game that actually is on the tellybox. Both would expect to be in the Top 2 once the weekend fixtures are over. Wrexham go to Brizzle for another tellybox game on Saturday. Stockport are also playing Friday at home to Posh whist Reading go to Lincoln. Barnsley, like Bolton are knocking on the door of the top 6 and play Orient at home.



Down in the dungeon, Shrewsbury go to Wigan, Burton are home to Exeter, we know where Cambridge and Crawley are, trap door dwellers Brizzle we've heard about and Northampton are home to Charlton.

We've played 'em before

In a fixture that hasn't come up often, the first meeting was in September 1973, Town have only lost once in 18 league games, winning 10 and drawing 7. That Cambridge weren't a Football League team until 1970, when they replaced Bradford Park Avenue is mostly responsible for that. The one defeat was back when they were managed by a certain Mr. Ron Atkinson who went on to famously manage West Brom, Man Utd, Aston Villa, Wendies and Forest amongst others and infamously get sacked by Sky TV for an off air (but recorded) racist comment. Cambridge quickly reached the giddy height of the old Division Two (now Championship) but as fast as they went up, they fell back down, setting records for most games lost (33) on the way. They had to apply (at the time) for re-election in the days before automatic relegation applied.

In 1990 they were managed by John Beck, who led them to promotion again, via their first trip to Wembley. Dion Dublin scoring the only goal against Chesterfield.



Next up?

The Boxing Day turkey fest against Stockport at home.

Pressers

Duff Duff and Brodie Spencer get the Radio Local grillings this week.

They see the Doc and get sent home

I keep pretending to be a forward

The view from under The Monks Hood

Garry Monk tries to stay in his Technical Area ... and fails.

Proper 'umble afterwards were arr Garry. Proper 'umble. .....pfft.

Will he stay in it on Friday? Strangely, for him, he doesn't have a lot to say for himself so far. Not one of his usual habits.

So their most current offering is a training session.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uEqBoWKPM0c

Ooh, look wot I found

https://x.com/CambridgeUtdFC/status/1869...gr%5Etweet

Kwik Kwiz

1. Nina Norkost
2. Nina Narowkost
3. Bud Liondin
4. Sum Baby Etiad Caldera
5. Koy Furriners Home

Happy Christmas to one and all.

..... an' you try an' tell this to the young folk of today .... an' they won't believe you .....

[WakeyTerrier]

Ruddy ridiculous this isn’t on the telly, might just catch the second half on the wireless if we can clear passport and the luggage carousel in time tomorrow night.

Nothing short of a win is acceptable IMO, we need to be coming out of the Xmas new year period in touching distance of the top 2

[theo_luddite]

'as the sunburn calmed down Wakey? 'ave you a suitcase full of lava rocks ready for the BBQ?

[jjamez]

Numero 4 is the stadium.

Going to be a slow defence for us tomorrow with Nigel out, potentially looking at lees, helik and Pearson having to deal with a goalscoring kachunga.

As for not being on tv, fawanews is a possible friend, if you can get through the first few pop ups and occasional buffer

[theo_luddite]

✅ Spencer and Marshall both start
✅ Tom Lees returns to the side
✅ Matty Pearson fit for the bench
❌ Nigel Lonwijk suspended
✅ Young forward Conor Falls in the squad

[Lord Snooty]

Ain't nobody
Like Kasumu

1-0

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Mon the Norn Irn Boys...

2-0

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Mon the Norn Irn boys....

3-0

[theo_luddite]

Well this is excellent. 0-1 up when I get to the pub and 3 up before I'm halfway down my first pint.
Will the Mad Monk be able to control himself on Mad Friday? Or will he be his "respectful" self?

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By the way if those videos aren't showing on the Android Mobile view, flip it to the Desktop site and they'll work.

[Lord Snooty]

Mon the Norn Irn boys....

4-0

[theo_luddite]

Good result, particularly with Smogport winning. Now in touching distance of Wrexham, though they have to play this weekend and we're putting distance between us and those on the fringe of play-off places. While Wycombe still aren't losing, they've only won one in the League this month. Happy weekend folks.

[WakeyTerrier]

Managed to get back and watch the last 12minutes or so on Sly Telly. Worth noting the Cambridge commentary were very complimentary about Town stating that we were "by far a better team than Wrexham"