[theo_luddite]

Lotus Road Subbuteo Stadium
Seth Efrika Road
Just south of The Scrubs
If only they'd snagged that bit of land
Brentford snagged
They'd have a new Subbuteo Stadium
Where you might able to see the goals you stand behind.
Larndan W12 BBC

Kick-off 13:30 UK Time
Sunday 28/01/24

Town are off to that little ground in Wes' Larndan Tarn, behind the old BBC TV Centre with more restricted views than you could ever imagine in a 20,000 seat stadium. Trying to sit in one of their seats is like trying to sit in a little kids pedal car. You can just about get your arse on the seat but your legs have to go over the row in front, which really means you have to stand up unless you are on really good terms with whoever is in front of you. In the upper tier, you can't see the goal line unless you are on the front row. In the lower tier, you can't see anything much better either.

(Allegedly, the club has now shortened the pitch, so the goalposts are now on the 6 yard line. See Pies, Pees and Pints).

It's debatable which stadium design is based on which stadium.



                                Loftus Road                                                                                 A 5 year year old's Subbuteo stadium
On the tellybox

It's FA Cup 4th Round weekend and Prima Donna League matches are thin on the ground. So Sky have picked this game as their Super, Smashing, Great, Win A Speedboat or Two in a Bed, Sunday Soccer Special. The only issue is that it's squeezed in between the back end of the Baggies v Wolves game and is due to kick-off 30 mins before Liverpool v Norwich, so persuading you local landlord/landlady to put Sky Sports Footy on while ITV show Liverpool v Norwich after the Black Country bun fight might take more than buying them a half or a glass of rosé. Just saying. Not too hard in Huddersfield, a bit of a problem for those of us scattered aound other parts. I'm getting Sunday lunch cooked for me again so I won't be watching either ours or the Liverpool game. I might get to see most of the local bun fight though.

So feel free to update at your leisure. I might just have time to post the match squads.

Pies, Pees and Pints

It's all in here
My usual sauce doesn't seem to update it's website as often as it did, so a different sauce with today's Sunday Lunch.

Latest news

Kevin the Gerbil has gone back home to USA'sville earlier than planned for some reason, but that hasn't stopped him dropping some more coach and player critical bombs on Town's Twitter feed. He's indicated that he sees this as a must win game. This of course is all leading to speculation about Mumbling Moore's job prospects. Radio Local's Horrible Hannah didn't hold back from putting her hobnails in during the presser. Listen below.

12 months ago a certain Mr. Fotheringham made the boast that Town would win the (almost) corresponding games, which were against QPR (at home, ironically) and Blackpool (away). Wendies to come next at home this season. Those games were played 4th/7th Feb. We drew them both, the fans had had enough of Fotheringham and he was toast. A few weeks later Colin came in, Town lost 3-0 at Stoke, won 2-1 at home to Brum, then lost 4-0 at Burnley and 0-4 at home to Coventry and the rest as they say was history. Will history repeat itself I ask?

Apart from REG going to Charlton, Josh Austerfield is sharing bunk beds and washing up duties on Platform 15 with Aaron Rowe at Crewe.


Out Injured/Suspended/Isolating

Ollie Turton played briefly for the stiffs on his way back from an ACL injury last week.
Back in hospital having more surgery on his meniscus, so he's done for this season.
Headley and Burgzorg still injured, as are the rest of them bar two.

Back training but not oven ready/Back in the frame

Dutch bean pole Balker has recovered from his bout of the pukes and squirts.

Pearson is back training but likely won't be in the squad.

Last time out

An assortment of post match comments on other well known websites last week plus ours said Town were either too negative and careful, didn't have players capable of finding the onion bag (cows arses, banjos and barn doors again) or we were well set up to frustrate Blackburn and catch them on the break. Which ever way you cut it, it ended up as yet another draw after we'd played them off the park on Boxing Day. We've now drawn 12, two more than Coventry, Watford and Rotherham. Nobody else is in double figures yet.



QPR moved themselves 2 points closer to Town by beating South (east?) London rivals Millwall 2-0 at home. Yeah, Millwall are south of the river but they are further north than Chelsea or Fulham. No matter how far north the Thames meanders, if you're on or south of the South Bank of the Thames, you're in South Larndan. You can be in West, East or North Larndan otherwise. Chuffing Lardaners? Whooo'd have one, eh?



Blunderland continued their iffy home form with a defeat at home to Hull. Southampton continued their club record run to go 20 games without a defeat. They are now a point behind Ipswich who were well ahead of the chasing pack not too long ago. In the top of the table clash it finished all square.

Meanwhile away from the land of make-belief, Rotherham drew at Boro (how have we lost a Cup game and a League game at home to them? Yes I know I asked that earlier in the week too). Then again, at least we didn't get spanked 6-1 at Chelsea this week. QPR I've already mentioned and Wendies lost at home to Coventry. Brum won at Stoke meaning we now need at least two wins to get off the trap door.



Musical Interlude

I may have mentioned in previous threads that a local lad, with a tightly permed hair do met a soon to be fish farmer with a tightly permed hair do sometime back in the last quarter of the last century. That first lad was Leo Sayer and the fish farmer was none other than Roger Daltrey.

Like I need an excuse to put an 'oo video on here.

(As sung by Maidstone fans at Ipswich this Saturday afternoon .....) 
Well done Maidstone 



or two



here's one that Roger the Dodger, er, borrowed from Leo.



The Sack Race

Two more casualties this week. Matthew Taylor got the push at League One Shrewsbury after only being appointed at the end of June last year.

He was shortly followed into the dole office by Michael Appleton at Charlton Athletic, just after he'd signed REG from us. Has REG jumped too early? Appleton was appointed in September last year. Both clubs are on 30 points, with The Shrews sat on the League One trap door and Charlton 4 places above on goal difference.

Honourable mention since my last thread to Troy Deeney who managed to get his P45 before his first pay slip at Forest Green.   

Paul Hurst, formerly of, erm, the parish of Shrewsbury first time round, Grimsby (thrice), Ipswich and Scunny managerial fame and 438 playing appearances for Rotherham, has plonked his backside in the hot luke warm seat at Shrewsbury.

Steve Cotterill (he's been every where man, he's been every where, including Shrewsbury) is now enjoying the selection of vegan pies and peas at Forest Green's canteen. He was a journeyman player making a total of 164 appearances for nobody that really matters, though Wimbledon were in what is now The Prima Donna League, when he played a few times for them. He's not far off the number of clubs in my golf bag when it comes to managers jobs. He's also been about as successful as the clubs in my golf bag to be honest.

Tables, Form & Roller coaster

We couldn't be much closer at the wrong end of the League.



No surprise either then that we're both way down in the form leagues. 







They've been 3rd bottom for almost as long as we've been 4th bottom this season. Their (lack of) progress is very similar to ours last season, except they went for the new manager thing this season long before we did last season. Will we roll that dice again before the end of the month, or will we give him another shot at redemption next week v Wendies?

Innies and Outies

QPR always seem to have more than a sprinkling of erm, experienced? players in their squad.
Getting them to play a tune together is another matter. That youthful goalie Begovic might have a promising future ahead of him though.



Their main business this winter has been loaning Andre Dozell to Brum.

Dieng went to Boro, Dickie to Brizzle in the Summer

Who's banging 'em in

Former loanee at Town Chris Willock chips in now and again. Ilias Chair is their main danger right now in either the creating or goal scoring department, more so than Dykes, in my opinion. After all, our sectret centre forward has twice as many goals as he has.





They can't all lose

With the FA Cup games there's games all over the place for this match day set of fixtures. L666s have already beaten Norwich on Wednesday, . Rotherham are at Ipswich, Wendies home to Watford. Above us Brum are home to Boro, Smoke at Sunderland, Millwall home to Both Ends. Some games are rescheduled for late February.



We've played 'em before

All square in the League, pity it's not a Cup game. Can we repeat last season's result, where we won 1-2 thanks to two goals from Ruffels?
Obviously, he won't be bagging a brace this season.



Next up?

Wendies at home next weekend.

Pressers

Horrible Hannah dives in, flailin' clogs an' all, doing the shin kickin' right from the off. Bill Tidy would 'ave bin fair chuffed.


“If the Lithuanians look like getting on top Neville, put t’boot in.”  – early cartoon with Cloggies, in Private Eye, Feb 17, 1967.

Well there's the short versions from Radio Local ....

Moore's Erm Mumbles. Erm.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0h7crty

Balker's Babble.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0h7bcyq

Or there's the long winded versions from Town's Website/YouTube Channel
How much of your life don't you want back?
Don't say I don't give you a choice. 



Radino Balker at around 04:45, Moore's Mumbles at around 1:07:30

The views from Wormwood Scrubs Front Gate.

https://www.qpr.co.uk/news/2024/january/...dersfield/

Stop the Press.

Alex Pritchard spits dummy out at Blunderland
https://www.sunderlandecho.com/sport/foo...er-4495277

Well I never. How totally and utterly predictable was that?