[Dingle-Dingle]

I said to my new girlfriend, "Now remember, my mother is very old, so speak nice and slow and very loud."

Then I said to my perfectly capable mother, "By the way, my girlfriend is slightly retarded."

What fun that was...

I used to go out with a girl who used to punch me every time she had an orgasm. I didn't mind too much until I found out she was faking them.


My G.F and I had a raging arguement about her going to a cosmetic clinic for breast reduction, I lost and it cost me a fortune,
But on the upside I have to admit she does look more normal with just two of them.




What is the difference between my girlfriend and a fully grown African bull elephant?
About 2 kilos.

My girlfriend got knocked down by a lorry yesterday, I asked the driver why he had hit her and he said " I didn't have enough diesel to go round her.


What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife? 10 years and 45 lbs.

The Welsh farmer's wife gave him a plate of grass for his dinner.
"What the hell is this?" he screamed.
"Well," replied his wife, "If it's good enough for your girlfriend, then it's good enough for you!"

In other news, Welsh scientists have found two new uses for sheep.

Meat and wool.


Felly mae'n ddrwg os rhoddir unrhyw drosedd

DD