[theo_luddite]

Did he hide in a fridge? Did he fly to Afghanistan?

Noooooo he turned up in Outer Northumbrialand so they couldn't get him back in time for questions or voting if they wanted to. I'm sure the unmasked visit to a red wall line of death beds (well they will be after he visited them) was planned and in his diary for ooooooh half a day at least.

I'm a Prime Minister get Me Out of Here.

All that was missing was two little Geordie TV pricks and a plateful of kangaroos bollocks for lunch.

Speaking of which our Antipodean buddies seem to have a Bodgit soundalike as their PM - or do we have a Morrison soundalike for ours? Hard to tell. Both lie through their teeth on pretty much the same issues, ie. every time their lips move. Maybe we finally drilled through the earth's core and found all the current bullshit in = all the current bullshit out in both Parliaments. Funny how that works, innit?

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In other news, Stevie G and his missus can no longer vote for Scottish Independence. Damn, 2 more votes gone missing.